Wednesday, May 31, 2006

At my wits' end.

Somewhere in the world
There is peace of mind
Somewhere in the world
That's what I must find
Somewhere in the world
Himesh must be unheard of.


[with apologies to Boney M].

Friends, foes, fans(?), and fellow countrymen - I can take it no longer. I am going away in search of that elusive place. I was thinking that the worst was over, but now I hear that Himesh Reshammiya is to lend his voice for the song "Mehbooba Mehbooba" in Ram Gopal Verma's remake of Sholay. Probably because he can howl so well. "Oo-oo-oo". Well. I don't want to be here when that happens.

Before I run away, I will leave you with an idea for foolproof, effective torture. Take your subject, tie him up or strap him down, plug his ears with huge earphones, and play Himeshquito's "Aa Aa Aashiqui main teri, Jaa Jaa Jaayegi Jaan meri" in a loop. Before long, your subject will be a blithering idiot and will do whatever you say.

And no, I am not giving you the link to that song. If you haven't heard it yet, good. We need sane people for the future of the world.

Update: Don't miss the comments on this one!! :)

54 comments:

P said...

haaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaa.... hoooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooooooooohooooooooooooooooohoooooooooooooohoooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D

Anonymous said...

pardon me for my ignorance but i have been reading abt this HR guy so much ..who is he? a composer or a singer? Its been long i have listened to any new Hindi music

Madhu said...

Hey shruthi.... well said, was watchin' CNN IBN the other day and the description for HR was just befitting.... "King of Nasal Melody".... can u beat that :0)).... well, all this with due rgeards to all his earlier compositions, but its becoming too much of late!!

chitra said...

Guess what,even i was getting much too irritated with him . to top it all he is even bagging all the awards. i think he has become popular because he is singing for emram Hashmi and the kind of scenes that goes with his songs!

i hope what you have heard abt Sholay is just a rumour! i love the original song and R.d.burman is too good.

Shruthi said...

P: I can almost hear you laughing :))

Anon: Ignorance, in this case, is truly bliss.
He was a composer, and he was alright. Then he started singing his own songs. That was when he got too much!

Madhu:King of Nasal Melody indeed :))
Actually most of his compositions, by themselves are quite good. In fact, if anybody else had sung them, they would have been great. But it's him!! And his voice!! :(((

Chitra: I wonder if it is just hype or whether ppl really like him!
I am a big fan of RDBurman, but I don't like his voice that much. As a result, I don't really like Mehbooba Mehbooba

Cyberswami said...

I have heard it. It is hateful that we are subjected to this kind of hysteria. Guy makes one song that is somewhat decent and like that fevicol ad you soon have 2000 people on the bandwagon.

an album isn't an album unless Mr Nostril features on it.

But hey, when he isn't singing through his nose, he isn't bad. Music directors and film producers, short-sighted as they are, are looking to cash in on this craze before it fizzles out. In doing so they contribute to its fizzling out. OD.

Crap. But oh well, you win some you lose some.

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Nirwa said...

Correction, Shruthi...

It is, Aannnnn Aaannn Aannnsheekii meinnn tennnri jaannn jaannnn janannnegi jannnn tennri..

Himesh Reshammiya is the worst thing happened to Music after Annu Mallik, Mika and Hans Raj Hans

Nirwa

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raj plus said...

Ha, good that I have been completely unaware of the existence of this character called Himesh.

Incidentally, the title of your post made me curious and I tried to find out the origin of the idiom. No luck. Is it wit's end or wits' end ?

Shruthi said...

Cyberswami:Yup! His music is quite ok... but the way he sings it... wonder who gave him the idea to sing in the first place!

Priyatham: Thank you! Yes, I did see that you have linked to me. Thanks! ;)

Nirwa: You are right! Correction accepted, Nirwa. ;)

Bogaleblog: You are welcome. :) Please steer clear ;)

Raj Plus: Good for you! Stay away :D
About the phrase...it has its origin in the bible, says this site - http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/50200.html
And it is "wits' end". They say, "Keep your wits about you".. when they want you to be alert, etc. So I think "wits" is something like "senses". So when you are going mad, or when you are "nearing the end of your tether", you use this phrase.

Bru said...

You are causing harm. i havent heard him and now i am curious to hear.... you are giving him undue publicity. and you know, i will start imitating him, creating agony to all around me :(

Khushi said...

ha ha ha ha!

Shastri said...

Call me nerdy if you will, but I have stopped tuning to Music Channels and even FM radio. I dont think I can take all this anymore. Yes, there is good stuff being produced but I belive merit will speak for itself and I will get to eventually hear about it. After I started working, I have made it a policy to buy music only officially and in my small way I encourage/discourage art by buying/not-buying.
Anyway, about the post itself, very hilarious indeed. And the post shows every bit of irritation you have had from nasal crooning.
I liked your style on the Bombay Rain post too. Could not comment. Am busy lately in replanting myself ;)

Supremus said...

OR make someone hear "Oh surrooooooooooooooooor" - that song is worse than chinese torture!

Why can't this guy stop singing!

Suyog

Srik said...

You know what...!! Im listening to Aashiq banaya and just happened to browse thru this site..!

Shruti... Its sooooo funny...!
HHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAA
Aashiq banaya Himesh ne Ramgopal pe....!!! Hahahahaha

Shruthi said...

Bru: I will call right now and tell those around you to keep you away from that deadly nasal voice. :O

Khushi: ;))

Shastri: Thanks :)
I do all my listening on the commute! Where I can't even turn off what i don't like :((

Suyog: My vote is for Aa aa aashiqui - for the worst ever song ;))
Yup why can't he stop singing! :(

Srik: Heh heh... coincidentally, just as I was typing this post, someone's ringtone was going "Jhalak Dikhlaaja" :D

direkishore said...

haha :)
i share your sentiments, bollywood music is becoming a mockery due to the thriving of such singers and music directors.

travel plaza said...

Ha ha Shruti, well said. My kids believe HR writes and sings all his songs on the toilet(suffering from constipation), hence the horrible howls:))

Anu said...

hahhaha.... the post is so funny, I have read it thrice today. I am really curious to hear this crooner's voice, who has brought about such strong emotions in you!!! hehhhehe!!!!

Anonymous said...

Your last statement made me feel good! :)

HR, is he the same guy who composed music for the titles of Hindi Serials?

Rajit
PS:I checked out "Ya Ali" after reading your (earlier) blog, that is a great song indeed....

Viky said...

Identify the song:
o
oo
oon
ooon
oooon
ooooon
oooooon
ooooooon
oooooooon

NO? Its-
ooooooooon huzoor(nnn)
13n 13n 13n surroor(nnn).


There is a house called "DIL" where all the walls have 13 written over them. Identify the song:

DIL ki surkh diwaron pe, naam hai 13, 13... naam hai 13 13...

I dunno why he has this fascination for the number 13.

And you know what? Now they are taking his music to ads...BAJAJ PLATINA...Ooooooooo Jhalak dikhla Ja.

And apart from the oooooonn, he has one more trait...one particular single or double syllable word repeats at least twice. And more often than not, its 13 13...13 13. No? Take a look-

Mar Jawa Jawa Mar jawa mar jawa mit jawa..
Aa Aa Aashiquin mein teri..
Zara Jhoom Jhoom..
Naam hai tera tera..
Tera tera tera surroor..
Laagi Laagi laagi prem rog laagi..
Jhalak dikhla ja, ek baar aaja aaja..

Viky said...

How can you say all these things about dear Himmy?

Crooning of Himmy's songs in Karaoke will help you clear your nasal passages. Breath control and nasal voice modulation improve beyond imagination. In fact, those who croon Himms breathe better than those who chant vedic hymns. I think they fare a tad better than those who do Surya namaskar and Art of Living.

Oooning once at bedtime will convince the mosquitoes that you are one of them, so they will not bite you. It will also identify you to the diseased dogs in the street, so they won't howl in front of your house.

Oooning with greater gusto, with increase in tempo, while listening to dhik chick dhik chick music will help cure constipation, and improve bowel movements. Himmy has 'himm'self said that he does not rest until he composes at least 3 songs a day. No wonder you don't get his appointment in the mornings.

Here is a man who is curing ailments, repelling mosquitoes and rabid canines, giving ideas for making brand new PJs, and all you have to say in his honour is this...Tch tch...

Ok, thats all...I'm rolling on the floor now....Hoo hoo hoooooooonnn...Oh no, now i'm laughing in ooooon

RK said...

shruthi, i came to your blog just now after posting about 'MS' in mine. and was surprised to read about Hinmesh nReshanmiya (spelt this way purposely).
fortunately haven't heard him just heard about him.
yaaru yaaru yen-yen maadbeko maadbeku. not everyone can become an rd burman or ilayaraja.

Shruthi said...

Direkishore: :)) Sigh, how true!!

Travel Plaza: Aaaah that makes a lot of sense :)))))

Anu: Nooooo please!! I don't believe I am actually giving him publicity!!

Rajit: I have no idea, maybe he did start off by composing tunes for serials... but can't say. Maybe some of my readers can help...
Yup Ya Ali is lovely right? :) Makes me smile in the midst of Himmania ;)

Viky: Oh my God... you are too much!!!!! I read your comments, rolled all over the floor laughing, and then laughed some more, and only now do I have the strength in my fingers to type!! :)))))
That was hilaaarious!! :)) I seriously think you should pick your comments, and put it up as a post on your blog :) And spread the laughs :)))
"Laughing in oooon" indeed! Ha ha ha ha ha ha haaa :)))))))

Rk Chhe chhe, MS and HR... what contrast :( Don't listen to HR!! :)

chitra said...

Hoon...howdu! Yelli noDidaroo er..I mean keLidaroo Himesh na daaLi...modalu baari okay okay annisithu. Aadre eega I promptly switch off the song :)!

Manasi said...

NOw all of you are being very very mean to poor HR ;) (BTW what is with "HR" that people of all over the world want to kill it??)
But truely I liked that guy when he was a composer. His songs have that jhum jao effect. Its not for those who are seriously serious and passionate abt music. And then if he doesnt sing how will all those hundreds of "train-singers" get a platform ?! PEople these days are just so inconsiderate ;)

sathish said...

with the songs he sings its very eaasy for anybody to sing, even a kid can mimic his voice, er nasal voice...
thats the reason hes famous..
ppl start singing his song in hatred & that makes it very famous!! :-)
whatever said & done hes there to stay

Anonymous said...

Guess HR must be part of some lobby...he was unheard of until a couple of years ago. I feel that any person who encourages him to sing must be caught and subjected to intense torrtue of listening to HR's songs. And his dress sense is really atrocious. He looks as though he hasnt taken a bath for past 5 years.

Vani

Shruthi said...

Chitra: Haudu! Overdose aagibittide!

Manasi: Heh heh :)) The music of some of his songs is actually nice. It his voice which spoils it ;)

Sathish: Yes, you have a point :)

Vani: Ha ha .. how true :)) And I really wonder who that person is who suggested to HR that he could start singing :)

Ashu said...

It feels good when you others feel the way you do!! Your post is good.. exactly what I am thinking these days especially when all the FM channels air his songs.. yuck...

Have you watched the MTV edition of 'Simi GireBall' with Himesh and Anu malik ?? :)) It was a good one!!

Ranjit Nair said...

Shruthi, he does compose some truly hummable songs; alas, if only he would stop singing them !!!

Anyway, your post made me laugh on a tough day; thanx!!

Btw, a friend of mine (linked on my blog as Clone-ji) expressed her revulsion for Himesh long, long ago; then I hadn't even heard of this chap (forget seeing that stupid beard and baseball cap). Little did I know how fortunate I was back then !!

Shruthi said...

Ashu: Ha ha :)) And nooo I haven't seen even one episode of Simi Gireball... but have heard so much about it!! :(

Ranjit: My thoughts exactly :)) Some tunes are actually good... I keep imagining how it might sound if Shaan, or Sonu Nigam, or Kunal Ganjawala had sung it!!

Anonymous said...

he has good future...his voice can be used for ambulance and factory sirens

Ashu said...

Anu Malik's and Himesh's duplicate are on the set along with our own 'Cyrus' as Simi Gireball :D

When himesh sings.. it always ends with ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hoozoor..
Don't miss it on MTV.

Anonymous said...

Hello!! HR rocks .. how can u insult such a grt crooner, this is blasphemy if u wanna know why..

1) Ppl suffering from constipation have found a effective non-invasive remedy for ...well... to get the bowels moving since this kind of crooning creates a vibration in the ears which sends pulse waves down to the stomach making the person immediately rush to the nearest washroom. The current research trends at the University of Sound and Music corroborate this.

2) His wonderful sonorous voice has given birth to more Sachin Tendulkar sound-alikes(if there is a word like that) making nasal voice the ubiquitous in the world. So all ye ppl with nasal voice do not despair HR is here to the rescue.

3) HR has given hope to all bathroom singers, now every guy with a nasal, guttural, donkey-like voice has decided to cut his album with of course more barely clad women swooning all over them.

4) The latest is that Gosciny and Uderzo (authors of Asterix comics) have decided to sue HR for copying their now famous bard Cacofonix and have accused HR of plagiarism and copyright infringement. Thats shows HR is very (in)famous

Well if these reasons are not enough to stop ye all from hurtling accusations at this great path-breaking singer-composer-actor of our generation, I dunno what will.

Reshamiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan...(in nasal tones) ;)


Kishore

travel plaza said...

I loved Kishore's comment:))

Viky said...

Himmy's tracks now wake the dead people alive. And yes, the link is on my blog.

k'dar said...

hey!
i'm a great fan of HR...because he is one bollywood product who improves my creativity as i try to answer these...
1.what is under HR's cap?
2.what happened to his mouth??
3.what does "oo-o-ooo" stand for?
4.from which planet did he come from?definetly nor mars :)
5.is "oo-o-ooo" a message from outer space trying to tell us about the invation of 'planet HR'?
6.is there a problem with his nose..or his mic??
so stop criticizing HR as he is the ultimate source for improvising my creativity and my knowledge about the unknown...yet..your hallucination is true

Raj said...

Well, i'm sure Himesh doesn't sing all those songs. He probably just sung a li'l aaas and ooos once and they reuse it. That would explain the similar sounding songs. I already had my reservations as far as the remake of sholay is concerned but now I'm sure that it will be unwatchable. Of course, dogs will love it. :)

மு.கார்த்திகேயன் said...

Dropped here from another blog..
Really nice post..Keep good work!!!

Swathi said...

i am one of those sane ones who still havent heard his croon but yaa after ur post, i wud definetly wanna hear his stuff (call it idle curiosity)

Shruthi said...

Anon: Ha ha... ambulance and factory sirens!! Why didn't I think of that!! :))

Ashu: Hee hee.. yes I have seen the ads - I shouldn't miss the HR one!! Sounds hilarious :))

Kishore: Ha hah aaaa :))))))) Cacophonix indeed!!!!! :)))))) How right you are!!! I feel like banging him on the head and burying him in the ground too :))))

Travel Plaza: Me too :)

K'dar: Heh heh... looks like he is a great subject for research, huh!! :))

Raj: Now that's a thought!! :)) Dogs and mosquitoes are the only ones who identify with HR :D

Karthikeyan: Thank you! :)

Swathi: You have been suitably warned... don't blame me after you listen to him :))

Abhinav said...

hey nice idea i'll try this on my Boss today.

Vinod R Iyer said...

Hey shruthi... But whatever we say.This guy has talent. And he has the mass following! ..Imagine some 26 "hit" songs in a span of what,6 months ? Even greats would find it difficult to get that.I wish he stops singing though ...atleast for a while.. give our brains a break from the mono tone.!:).. And I heard he has some 10 films in hand now.If he continues singing ...then there is no respite :)..He should give a chance to "singers" for a change..Nice post..

Rk said...

Hey...
Why is there so much angst and hatred against HR, I fail to understand. It is TVs and radios who are to blame to repeat his songs no end.
He is a good composer and a singer if you ask me. His songs stay and leave an impact. Havent we had so many bad singers (Kumar Sanu for one and then there was Daler Mehndi) ?
I am not an admirer of him but can not see why everyone is up arms against him.

Know what...ghosts too love him :)

Shruthi said...

Abhinav: Oh.. err... let me know the result :D

Vinod: That is the whole mystery! :D His music is good and catchy, only wish that he doesn't sing it! :)

Rk: Nobody is denying his talent in composing :) - But his voice - no thanks. Yes we have had bad singers - but that's not a reason to tolerate another one.
Everybody is up against him coz nobody denies his popularity, but nobody can understand the reason for it, given his voice :)) He is a figure everybody loves to hate. Or rather, love him or hate him, you cannot ignore him.

Emma said...

You got to be kidding - tell me you are. I like the original too much to even imagine someone like HR singing it!

Everytime I hear this man croon, there is just one thought on my mind these days - get rid of him, and claim not guilty on the basis of temporary insanity. Trust me, that is what he does to my nerves!

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Anonymous said...

I admire HR for two reasons:
1) I was a huge TV addict. And I stopped watching TV when he started singing. (I have plenty of spare time nowadays!)
2) I stopped listening to the repetitive, boring and irritating FM radio channels.

Thanks Himesh, long live nasal!

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