Cookie Recipe

S and I had to go somewhere where it wouldn't have been wise to take Puttachi along, so we left her at my friend M's place, so that she could play with M's son  Sk, who is her oldest friend.

M happened to be baking cookies, and when we left, Puttachi was already signing up to help M.  She came back home with a box of yummy cookies that she had shaped, and she also told us how to bake cookies.

Then she took a piece of paper and wrote the recipe down.

Read it top to bottom.  If you don't know Kannada, just give up.  If you do, give it a try before reading further. :)

She's written "Hitt togondu, vuttabeku.  Amele volage benne hakbeku, pan togondu benne hachbeku."

Meaning "Take the flour and press it, and put butter into it.  Then take the pan and smear butter on it."

If she completes it, I will give you the rest of the recipe :)

Swimming

Puttachi and I are learning swimming.

For some reason or the other, I'd never seen how Puttachi is in water.  Sure, she sat in tubs full of water and played with toys for as long as I let her, but never in a proper pool, and only a couple of times at the beach....

So it came as a surprise to me how much at home she is in the water.  As she put it to me after the first couple of days, "Amma, when I am in the pool, I forget everything.  I forget my name, your name,  I forget who I am, and who you are.... that is how much I love being in the pool."

 That glorious feeling of just being!  How lovely!

Story Junkie

Puttachi's story addiction has reached heights I never though possible.  She is insatiable.  She wants new stories all the time.

 And she thrives on telling stories too.  Her stories usually ramble on endlessly, incorporating elements of stories that have recently fascinated her. More significantly, anything she sees or hears or feels when she is telling the story, enters the story.  

"And then Monkeypooh walked and walked in the forest and then Ripsy the Gypsy was with it, and the Monkeypooh whined and said that it wanted to go to the toilet and so Ripsy the Gypsy said where can we get a toilet here, and then..... Amma, I'll go to the toilet and come back and continue, okay?"

Then she comes back and says, "Amma, where was I?"  And then I panic if I hadn't really been listening.....

Then I say, "Puttachi, eat this apple."

Then she starts eating the apple and between mouthfuls, says, "Then Monkeypooh said ok I finished doing susu, now I am feeling hungry, and then Ripsy the Gypsy gave it some apples..."

You get the picture? :)

She collars anybody who shows the slightest interest in her stories, and bores them out of their wits - the stories go on until I say, "Okay, you've got to wind it up, okay?"  and then she really does wind it up in two seconds flat, if necessary.

She makes up the most outrageous names for her characters  - Haalla, Hashalabusha are some I remember.  Monkeypooh and Ripsy the Gypsy are the better of the names.   And sometimes she forgets the name herself in the next minute.

"Once there was a little girl who was born just then.  She got born, then she told her mother, hey amma, I am your daughter, my name is Dakatra, and then her mother was very happy and said, oh my baby I was waiting for you I am so glad you are here... and you have such a sweet name.......... (pause, eyes wide) amma, what was the baby's name?"

People who know Puttachi will know what I mean when I say that she never really throws tantrums about anything.  If she wants something that I can't let her have, she understands my reasoning, and doesn't really protest, though she is unhappy about it.   But the other day, she asked for two bedtime stories, and I gave her a choice between the two, and she chose one.  The moment I finished it, she asked me to tell the other.  I refused, as a matter of principle, and also because I was looking forward to some quiet time.   But she screamed with disappointment and cried so hard that I was stunned - and finally after she calmed down, S felt sorry for her (because her tantrum was for stories and not for anything else!) and stepped in with a book to tell her another small story.  She was lying morose on the bed - the moment she spotted the book in S's hand, she jumped up like a jack-in-the-box.  What a total mood change!  It was hilarious.

 Exhausted by having to supply her constantly with stories, I started telling her the mother of all stories - The Mahabharata, from The Puffin Mahabharata by Namita Gokhale  A great book for children, nice print, interesting illustrations, and very well and simply told.  I am probably enjoying it as much as Puttachi, though I'm having to employ all my ingenuity to modify the incidents that aren't really suitable for a nearly-5-year-old.

I can't wait for her to start reading full books on her own, so that I can leave her with a stack of books and let her discover stories on her own. 

Child Sexual Abuse Awareness Month

April is Child Sexual Abuse Awareness month.  

My daughter is a very affectionate child and willingly hugs even people that she has met for the first time and spent just an hour with (if she likes them.)  That is something about her that people find very sweet (and I do too.)  But yet, somewhere deep inside, it worries me.  How do I teach her her limits without scaring her off?

And I worry that since she knows that people love it if she hugs them, does she hug them even though she is not comfortable?  Sometimes, we encourage her to hug, because, come on, hugs are beautiful, and there can never be enough of hugging.  But what if she thinks hugging is the norm?  Should we stop encouraging her to hug people she doesn't know too well, even though we know them well, and she's spent time with them with us around? 

I really don't know. I have no idea where to draw the line.  I don't want to throttle her natural desires.  I guess I can only rely on her good sense, and teach her to respect her body, and be firm about not doing anything that she doesn't want to. 

And if at any time she doesn't want something done to her (hugging, kissing, tickling, even if it is by us, her own parents) then we simply must respect her wish and withdraw immediately. 

And if she ever displays discomfort or hesitation when somebody else is pinching her cheeks or kissing her or pulling her towards them (in our presence) we must not chide her, worrying about what the person will think.  We must encourage her to draw away, if that is what she wants.  And if the person is offended, it is up to us to say something like, "Perhaps she doesn't feel like it, let her be."  For our children, we are the ones they can trust unconditionally.  And if they don't find support when they need it, well..... what do I say?  That's one of the worst situations for a child to find itself in.

With this kind of support, she will realize that she has complete right over her own body, and that she has the final say in it.  And that is perhaps the only way she will learn to respect her body.

Am I being too paranoid?  In this issue, there is probably nothing like being too paranoid.  We as parents must be totally aware and alert about everything that there is to know about child sexual Abuse.

Unfortunately, CSA is more common and prevalent than we think it is.  And a child who has been abused can in some instances, be scarred for life.  So what do we do?  How do we handle it?

The site  or this app  has many pointers and lots of information.  I urge you to spend some time there.

But I will collate all the information that I have gleaned from my study.

Teach your child (both girls and boys are at equal risk.  I'm just using "she" here for convenience.)

- Give your child the Good Touch Bad Touch talk. An example website (there are many more)

A Good Touch - is something that makes you feel good, feel happy.
A Bad Touch - is anything that doesn't make you feel comfortable.

- Tell the child about where it is inappropriate to touch and be touched. 

- In an age-appropriate way, the child must be introduced to the private parts, and must be taught that only certain people are allowed to touch those parts, and that too, only to keep it clean and healthy. 

- She must be taught that if someone needlessly asks her to take off her clothes, she mustn't, and if someone takes off their clothes in front of her, that is wrong too.

- If someone touches her inappropriately, she must immediately stop them, or scream, or run away, and not be with them alone, ever again.

- If anything untoward happens, she must tell her parents immediately. 

- Even if the abuser says that it is a game or a secret, she simply must tell her parents, come what may.  No secrets should be kept from parents.  And this should be literally drilled into the child.


For the parents:

- Unfortunately, child abusers are most often known to the family -  known and trusted.  So you have to make the right decisions about whom to leave your child with.  Preferably, not alone with anybody, and if it is inevitable, drop by unannounced from time to time.

- Keep a watch on your child's behaviour - any behavioural change must not be ignored.

- If the child does come and tell you about an incident
  - react with concern, but remain calm.
  - do NOT react with disbelief.  That could be the worst thing you could ever do.
  - Take action immediately.  Apathy is dangerous.

Please share your tips, and spread the awareness. 

The late bloomers

Pride of India, with yellow laburnum below it.


Some better pictures of the Copper Pod - you can see this nearly everywhere now.  The trees are bursting with these little yellow flowers.

Close up of Copper Pod


Pride of India (there are pink versions of these flowers too.)


Pride of India, closeup


Gulmohar


Gulmohar trees are now in full blossom.  They are so striking!

A fabric-painted baby blanket

Summer is here and with it, lots of activities with Puttachi. 

I draw a lot of inspiration and ideas from the internet, and we've made lots of things together.  So I thought I would start putting up pictures of things I've made, alone or with Puttachi - so that you can get some ideas, maybe....

I made this baby blanket when I was expecting Puttachi.  The simplest kind, really.  Drew simple pictures, and used fabric paint to colour them.   This could have very well been an applique blanket. 
After I finished painting, my mother attached soft flannel cloth underneath it, and sewed it all up with a red-and-white checked border. 

And yes, that is Puttachi's 2-week-old head.

Tree Mania

I wasn't always obsessed with trees. I have always loved trees, but didn't care much about identifying them. Due to various reasons, some of which I am not even aware, I got interested in identifying trees. And I am pretty sure that my beloved MN Krishna Rao park provided the right atmosphere. Walking there every morning and taking my daughter to play there every evening, it did things to me. It is difficult not to be immune to the charms of trees, especially lovely, old, might trees. I think I started considering them my friends, and was ashamed that I couldn't name my friends, and so....

This spring, I have reached the peak of my obsession. That is why the article, the photographs....

My mania has rubbed off on Puttachi too...

S: Which one is honge, point it out to me....
Me: Wait, let me show you... it's a very beautiful tree...
Puttachi:  (horrified) Amma, what are you saying?  All trees are beautiful!

S: Which one is that?
Me: Tabebuia
S: But I thought Tabebuia is yellow....
Puttachi:  (In an all-knowing tone) Papa, Tabebuia can be yellow and pink.

Attagirl!

For those of you who have been asking for more information, here are a few books and links:

Hasiru Honnu by BGL Swamy - A book in Kannada, it is an account of a field trip by a Biology class in a college. A very entertaining story, but with liberal doses of information on trees, their uses, their origins. An utter delight. This was one of the first books I read in Kannada.

Namma Maragalu by HR Krishnamurthy (Published by Karnataka Rajya Vijnana Parishat.) - Again in Kannada.  This is just a straight, sincere account of common Indian trees. Very informative.

The problem with both the above books is that there are no photographs, only sketches. And it is not very easy for a newbie to relate the sketch to the actual tree/leaf.

This book - Indian Institute of Science - A Botanist's Delight - K.Sankara Rao solves that problem. Full of great photographs, with short writeups on all flowering trees, and even bushes and plants.

Updated: The Book of Indian Trees by K C Sahni, published by the Bombay Natural History Society - another good book about trees, with plenty of details, a lot of sketches and a few photographs (Thanks, Anu.)

Then, there are a couple of excellent online links that have pictures and information all in one.

Flowers of India

Flowering Trees-1 and Flowering Trees-2

Trees of India

Here I leave you with some more pictures from MN Krishna Rao park. By the way, all the photographs I have taken of flowering trees are from this one park!

Eucalyptus Tree


A bustling bee-hive

Beautiful, tender new peepul leaves

 
 The utterly fascinating gulmohar tree - gnarled branches, straight out of a fairy tale.

This is a silk cotton tree, I think.  A similar-looking tree next to it has mature pods falling down to the ground, and is bursting open, with soft silk-cotton spilling out.  I don't know why this tree is still leafless, and the pods are still green.

Sausage Tree (courtesy Anu)

Plumeria

Deva kanagile or Plumeria - beautiful flowers with a lovely fragrance.



Is the flower in the second photo also devakanagile? A slightly different version maybe? The trees look very similar, and so do the flowers, though the second one is smaller. Do let me know if you know.

Jacaranda, Pongamia, Copperpod and Gulmohar

Jacaranda is quite distinctive - it is difficult to miss these flowers. They stay on the tree for a very long time. And they totally transform even the surroundings of the tree. The carpet of mauve flowers is particularly pretty.


Pongamia (Honge) is one of the prettiest of trees. Thick foliage, with all the leaves pointing downwards, there are some lovely specimens I can see on the roads. This is a relatively small tree, and not the best-looking one. In the breeze, these leaves ripple so gently. Mesmerizing.

Small flowers of the honge tree. They have a beautiful fragrance, and right now, the ground underneath these trees are covered with these little blossoms.


The copper pod tree with little yellow flowers and the distinctive copper-coloured pods. Very tall trees. And there are so many of them around. These trees are also planted to line roads, as I have observed. They are all in bloom now, and again, the ground underneath these trees is practically covered with these yellow blossoms.

 The gulmohar has just started blooming. In just a few weeks, all the gulmohar trees will be ablaze with scarlet. These are the early ones.
 

Tabebuia

 Tubular flowers that grow in clusters. The yellow tabebuia bloomed first, and then the pink and white.  They stay for a very short time, just a week or so, before they start drying up and falling off.



Yellow tabebuia with flowering rain tree in the background.

Mahogany

These trees are what I would call "tall and stately." 

The tiny yellow-green flowers are falling now, and you can see carpets of it below the mahogany trees.  They have a lovely, subtle fragrance.  The pod you see contains the seeds like those in the photo below.


When tossed in the air, these seeds whirl and then fall down very beautifully.

Rain Tree

Rain Tree - with a large, symmetrical umbrella-like canopy.  You can see them all over South Bangalore lining avenues.

These are the flowers of the rain tree

Once the flowers dry up, they fall, and make a kind of carpet on the floor, like this.  You can see them in bunches on the road everywhere right about now.
Those pods you see are the ones from which we used to make cork balls in our childhood.  You can also frequently see them on tarred roads, absolutely flattened, with only the seeds protruding from the road.