Tuesday, January 05, 2010

The Terrible Twos

I would read of tantrums and meltdowns, and I would read about the Terrible Twos, and then I would look at my sweet-tempered child, shrug and leave it at that.

Serves my complacence right.

Overnight, Puttachi has transformed into this kicking, clawing, screaming little thing that I cannot recognize. I am just recovering from a 1 hour 15 minute session - and the issue? Taking off her frock.

Let's take off your frock
I'll do it myself
No, you take it off for me.
No I'll do it.
I don't want to take off my frock.
Ok don't.
It's dirty. I want to take it off.
Ok take it off.
Take it off for me.
Ok, come here.
No, I won't.
Ok, come to me when you are ready.
I am ready.
Ok come.
No I am not ready.
Ok, whenever you are ready.
Take it off for me.
Ok, come here.
I won't.
Ok don't.
Help me take it off!
Ok, come here, I will help you.
I don't need any help.
Great, take it off yourself.
No I won't.

So basically this was going on in a loop for those 75 minutes. And all this while Puttachi was screaming at the top of her voice, and crying, tears streaming down her face, running up and down, kicking, occasionally clawing at me, hitting.

In the middle of all this, I was trying to distract her by singing silly songs, speaking in strange voices, jumping up and down, behaving like a clown - basically trying to get her to turn her attention to something else. I even tried leaving her alone to calm down, ignoring her, hugging her and speaking soothing things to calm her down, everything.

After about an hour, she was so tired, hungry and sleepy (she'd just got back from playschool) that she didn't even have the strength to cry.

Finally, I put on one of her fave rhymes on my laptop, and turned up the volume. She protested, asked me to switch it off, but gave in, and came to me, sat on my lap, kicked for a bit, then calmed down, and fell asleep on my chest.

Where has my sweet little girl gone? :D


MindfulMeanderer said...

ohhhh they are all tantrum & drama queens at this age!!! :)

Nikki... said...

this is just the begining:) Its quite difficult to actually tell what they want, but its fun.. You will miss it once she comes out of it, so enjoy :):)

Anonymous said...

ah tell me about it!! sometimes it gets so bad with N, that i cant even remember where it all started. By which time even i've run out of patience. but i've realised its best to do things exactly the way they want it soon after they come from school. I think they're too tired, hungry and sleepy at that time.
first time here. came to check out the blog after meeting you that day. And i loved your 'bombay' posts. it took me back there and brought back forgotten memories.

Mama - Mia said...

oh well! i hope she gets over it soon! have been dealing this or what feels like forever! everything takes 30mins and all the negotiation just drives me crazy! hehe!

but i am lauu with her!! lets catch up again soon! :)

starry eyed said...

Egad! Around here, we get maha-insulted at simple requests, such as "Go pee", or "Put on your chaddi". So we have christened him Sir Stomp-a-Lot and ignore him completely until he does it.

But i totally get how difficult that period after school is...they're tired, hungry and I feel pity, but he's also usually covered in dust and chocolate(!!!), so I hold back the love and sympathy til he's clean!!!!

Enjoy the next coupla years ;)

Priya said...

Be prepared:) More to come:) "I want this dress..that dress this color dress no skirt no pant..dupatta dress :)" My little one does this ....She selects dresses on her mood and is not ready to wear what i select

Jaanamari's appa said...

Reading this I almost fell off my chair laughing, as it felt like she were writing about Abhinav! :)

We usually distract him and if that doesn't work, we try to let him have his way even if it means he wears his dirty clothes, unless of course its a really extreme case like wearing a sweater in the cold. Sometimes we make up interesting stories, like the spider that dirtied his dress so he has to take it off to have his bath! There's no end to the creativity & patience required for a non-violent solution. Sometimes we even tell him stories of other kids who got locked up by someone else for not having their lunch etc not so non-violent but somehow we have to get on with the particular issue and move on to other things! :)

Shruthi said...

Mindful, :((

Nikki, really?! :)

akamonica, yeah, I'm realizing that I have to be the Buddha when the tantrum is happening!
Glad you liked the Bombay posts.

Abha, what is worse is that it has taken me entirely by surprise! Overnight transition!
Yup, gotta met up!

Starry, LOL at stomp-a-lot! :D
And next TWO years? *scream*

Priya, oh that she already does, but now she is not sure about what she wants, and therein lies the problem!

Jaanamari's appa, only if she listens during those tantrums can I say something! :D

Adu said...

i love how you write about your conversations with puttachi, shruthi. i have such a vivid image of cute, naughty lil puttachi in my mind :)

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