Monday, November 12, 2007

The flip side!

I see that many of you are getting influenced by my baby posts, and you want to have babies too. Ok. But a warning. Not everything is roses in baby-world. It is just that I choose to write only about the positives. BUT. Since I realize that you innocent beings are getting influenced by this hunky-dory picture, I thought it was time to present the right picture before you. So here goes.

How is it, to have a baby? What does it entail? Here is a picture - of the first six months at least.
  • Being available 24/7. No breaks. No slacking.
  • Baby becomes primary, the centre of the universe. Everything and everybody revolves around it.
  • Sleep? What's that?
  • Having a bath in 5 minutes, with one ear on the door for the sound of the wail.
  • Excellent control on bladder and bowels.
  • There is no time that you don't think of baby. Even if you are away. If I leave the baby and go away for a while - to the parlour, to the shop around the corner, to the doc, to the neighbour's house or even on a small walk, I call every five minutes. "What is she doing?"
  • When husband calls from office and asks, "What's my sweetheart up to?", he doesn't mean you.
  • All that you seem to talk about with husband is about the baby. So, you decide, let's set aside an hour where we'll talk about something else. The hour starts now. And baby wails from the next room. Sigh.
  • TV? Theatre? Movies? Concerts? What's that?
  • Days seem to be a continuous haze of feeds and nappy changes.
  • Endless hours of walking the baby to put her to sleep.
  • Innumerable attempts at transfering baby from arms to crib without waking her up.
  • And then kiss her and wake her up. Sigh.
  • Excruciating back-aches from carrying the baby around.
  • Before the baby, when you had to go out, all you had to do was - pull on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, run a comb through your hair, and you are set. Now. Try to pull on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Find that they don't fit any more. Don trousers and a loose kurti instead. Dress the baby. Diaper. Frock. Light jacket. Booties. Check baby for signs of hunger. If hungry, feed. If not, proceed to packing the baby's bag. Diapers, wipes, cotton, water, extra set of clothes, mat, napkins to wipe drool, plastic bags to put soiled diaper in. Extra diapers. Extra pieces of cloth (just in case). Sweater (what if it becomes cold?). Wrap. Extra wrap. Check, recheck, re-re-check. All set, get ready to go. Open the door. Baby soils diaper/shows signs of hunger. Back to changing/feeding. Repeat process until successful. Unless it is too late to go.
  • Make an attempt to look good, then go out with your baby - everybody looks only at baby. Nobody even glances at you. You could have as well gone in pyjamas.
  • Visit someone's house with baby. You ring the bell, husband is trailing, carrying baby. Door is opened, and the host says, "Hi.. what.. where is the baby?" Looks beyond me, sees the bundle in husband's arms, then says, "Oh ok, come on in, then".
  • Grin and bear all the advice and comments on how you look after baby. Nothing you do can be right. Case in point - pick up a crying baby, and you are spoiling it. Don't pick up a crying baby, and you are heartless. It is a lose-lose situation.
  • Make major changes in career, family life, relationships, friendships.

I can't remember the other points I had made in my head - coz I am sleepy and tired after a long day - and this is the only time I get online... there you go.. one more point!

So, here you have it. This is what it means to have a baby. Lots of work. No rest. Ok? Now, all of you who have been influenced by my rosy baby posts - you can stop reading now.

For the others - All these hardships are real, yes, and yet, at the end of it, you look at the innocent, trusting, delightful creature in front of you, and all that you can say is, "It's all worth it."


Pradeep Nair said...

Having a baby is a decision arrived at by the couple, and it's just another phase in life, nothing more nothing less.

A baby's arrival affects a father as much as its mother. For me I couldn't believe that I wasn't reading papers, magazines, books or I wasn't watching my favourite BBC I wasn't doing much other than running after the baby!

Your blog is quite colourful. May be your designer could slightly lighten the background so that the words are easily readable, or rather they stay in focus.

Supremus said...

Well, you've scared me hehehe - not that I am planning on any babies-shabies for another good 3-4 years.

But I will send this out to everyone of my friends who are planning on having babies, and I will keep this handy everytime the other half decides she wants one hehehe!

Wunderyearz said...

Shruti you just spoke on behalf of all moms out here .........

There is another hurdle awaiting you ......once puttachi comes to love her outings and she is dressed to go out you cannot delay it by even a moment .......else she would surely bring the roof down(from my personal experience;-) )

*~\[ Yuga ☼ Sunshine ]/~* said...

hahaha... its a nice read with reality touch... ;)

Collection Of Stars said...

Right on all accounts except one - this is NOT limited to the first 6 months. It goes on and on and on...;)
Loved the new look.

Srik said...

What a wonderful post.
Extrordinary way of narration... take a bow professor :-)

BTW, hows S's sweetheart doing? ;)

Anonymous said...

Hopefully this brings down the future population a wee bit !!!

Sunita Venkatachalam said...

When husband calls from office and asks, "What's my sweetheart up to?", he doesn't mean you.

Lol Lol Lol

Anonymous said...

He he that is SOME reality check :D

Anonymous said...

Deja Vu

Anonymous said...

Same Old Anon: Couldn't agree with you more - Sigh!!!

Ram N said...

Humour seems to be in excellent flow in this ,,,,,

was nodding at most of the points ....

Unknown said...

everythin has its own pros n cons! BTW, When did you change the layout of yo blog?? Its different! =)

Anonymous said...

Hey Shruthi, how are you? Its been a long long time!!! :)

Loved the new bright layout!!! Nice post this but sorry - am too deep in the planning stage to be affected by it. Its a fight to the finish now. :)

The lil one looks sooooo adorable.....please use some kajal on her (meri najar naa lage).... Hope both S and you are doing good. Take care.

Anonymous said...

On the flip side for men.. do mothers reserve kisses reserved only for the baby?

Anonymous said...

But I still want to get married and have children. Probably I'll name her Shruthi...just so that she grows up to become a wonderful writer like you :)

Anonymous said...

Lovely post as usual.. nice to be grounded to reality! Only thing is, either your letters need to get a bolder color, or your background needs to face a little bit,hard to read!

rajk said...

One important thing that I read somewhere...
"The biggest change after having a baby is that from then on, whenever you read any horrible thing happening to any child, you can't help imagining how you would feel if it happened to your child, and it shakes you to the core, every time!!"
It sounds scary but very true...I'm saying this from experience!
And to all those who said they were 'scared' or 'put off' after reading your blog, don't miss the fine print in the end of the blog----It's all Worth It!!!

Rahul... in City of Dreamz said...

hmmm.... you had actually succeeded in giving me second thoughts abt a baby...

but then your last line has again reaffirmed my faith...

"Its all worth it" :)

Shruthi said...

Thank you all for your comments :)

RajK>, I absolutely agree!

A reader, What a compliment! I am totally bowled over! Thank you :D

Anonymous said...

Good one... doesnt change when they grow up as well :-)

- -